Sage Advice

Dear Joe,

Today I had an interesting conversation with my best friend over the phone which to my surprise lasted a little over 4 hours.

She was telling me how she was lonely and wanting a good man in her life. When I asked her what her "perfect man" consisted of, the very first quality that she listed off was that this man had to be "well endowed", then the rest of her requirements fell right behind.
I laughed at that, and then asked her once more if that was truly the list by importance because if it was, IMO her priorities were way off.

Come to find out there was a most recent ex that embodied all but that 1 requirement of hers, due to years of steroid use. Other than that, he was a perfect 10.

This is when I had to just tell her my thoughts and feelings on this subject and why I felt that she shouldn't put too much emphasis on that 1 downfall. It can be worked around and isn't the end of the world.

This is when the subject of you came about. Yes, I told her the truth about what happened, what I did, and where it has landed me today. I told her to really think twice, maybe 3-4 times before totally writing this man off just because he doesn't "measure up" (couldn't help myself there).

Because it is increasingly hard to find someone who loves you for you. She has 3 children and one of them has a mental handicap and this ex of hers loved them all as if they were his own. RARE.

I told her despite my having a crazy family, a schitzo ex husband who was currently trying to screw up my life, and my major bouts of depression, you saw past all of that and loved me unconditionally. Something that I have not ever found to be plentiful within most of the Human Race.

She understood what I was trying to tell her.. To not let that man go. For any reason. That she did not want to end up in a similar situation that I am in.

I take that back... it was a 5 hour conversation, but 4 hours of it was talking about you. It was amazing to then start to remember things that never used to occupy my mind. I was pretty happy to have been able to dig up what I did in memories because I forget just about damn near everything these days.

I think she could tell how much I loved you by all the questions she was asking me. It was nice to get to talk to someone about it all. Not that I haven't done that already, but with a good friend.

Hopefully she will take my advice and not bail just yet. Give the guy a decent chance, and not run out of fear or that she is holding out for something that doesn't exist: Perfection.

Though I may debate that concept as you have been that person for me.

Love,
"Jill"